Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Zombie Running

Liam left the gate open the other night.

We have a driveway that's about 100 feet from the street to the house. In the early morning, about 6 A.M., I always let the boy dogs out. Dil is jittery and feeble and Zombie is a big goofy pup of about 50 pounds. They run crazy out the door and spill into the yard rooting for whatever they can destroy as I walk down to the gate to get the News Suppress.

And the gate is opened. Zombie spies it and is off and out like a doofus Sea Biscuit tearing down the street at a bazillion miles an hour. Every dog in the hood is barking for him, like when Bromden escapes the nut house, and I am following in my Feety Jammies shouting "You stoooopid, stoopid fecking dog!!!! You mickeyfickey dog!!! Zombie come come!!! Zombie come home!!!

At 6 in the morning.

Even the monkeys across the street were awake and howling with all their lungs could muster.

Being at the top of the food chain is not all it's cracked up to be.


Blogger vivage said...

Hey, you forgot to tell about the neighbors helping, and those kids of ours loping down the street to the musical sounds of their dad cursing.

11:06 PM  
Blogger Billy Canary said...

I called both Princess and Liam on their cell phones and said "You better get out here and chase this dawg down 'cause I'm in my Feeties and I'm hoppin mad!" They came moping out, shuffling down the middle of the street in the morning drear.

Luckily, one of the neighbor girls who lives down the street came out and the danged dawg went right to her and she grabbed his collar and walked him right past me and turned him over to the mopey kiddos.

Dogs are not this mans best friend.

10:37 PM  

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