Sunday, March 16, 2008

Zombie Running Deux, Mother Canary Halluhalluhallucinacinates, and The Canaries Haven't Rehearsed in Three Weeks

Zombie the battaram dog ran out the gate again. He zoomed down Rubberdux Ave. with his drooly tongue flapping in the breeze and never once looking back over his shoulder. Viv was following him in the Mitsubishi and I on my bike. To make a long story short, we covered 3 miles in about 45 minutes, made contact with a lesbian couple who kindly gave us three breaded stegasaurus chicken nuggets as a dog lure, briefly met a gentleman who tried to herd the danged dog with his SUV, rode a cross country bike ride through a hundred yards of knee-high vegetation and stopped on a bluff overlooking the Mighty Rio Nada from which we could see a herd of wild river pigs and a bum encampment inhabited by two or three scroungy fellows playing "All You Need is Love" on their ukuleles.

OK. I made some of that up, but not much.

All you need to know about Mother Canary's hallucinations is that a bladder infection combined with a medicine called Urispaz (Your A Spaz?) is a lot cheaper than you-know-what and you cut out the middle man. Just put on the Iron Butterfly and away you go.

Lastly, the Canaries haven't rehearsed in three weeks. How will popular music as we know it survive?

3 Comments:

Blogger Donita Smith said...

It's gonna be four weeks by the time all that important stuff gets handled. Dude, I'm jonesing.

5:20 PM  
Blogger bullthorn said...

Where can I get a bladder infection?

11:33 AM  
Blogger Billy Canary said...

In your bladder.

8:45 PM  

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